New Therapist, Old WoW, and Confused Realationships.

Well I met my new therapist last week. She's so new that even the staff have forgotten her name. It'll come to me. But she was fun and I felt comfortable with her right away. We chatted and as usual the conversation involved my ex.

After my blabbing (and the lights eerily flickering out) she brought up a good point. Maybe it isn't the depression holding me back, but my social anxiety. My fear of change, or meeting new people, or losing the few I have, is holding me back. That I panic just thinking of me losing Rob forever. That I panic about new places and the people there.

I never saw things that way till now. That the depression was just a natural symptom of my anxiety not the other way around. That I fear change and non control (hence my fear of driving). She decided to have me write a list of my life goals and to bring it to her next time.

I like this lady. She gets me well and I like that.

WoW happened. Spending too mach time, but not nearly as much as I used to. I even work my job at the same time hehe. No real news there. But as for me in Rob...

We were in the middle of well ...bumping uglies when he decided to mention that he was interested in someone through WoW. Not that she has reciprocated but that he was interested in dating her. This of course sends me into a full day of crying, flipping out, and basically doubting if even these pills will help me.

He of course spent most of it trying to back pedal and comfort me but the damage was done. I want to say I don't care, but it...really hurts. I should expect him to keep waiting on me, but...it hurt and hurt really bad. I dunno bout him and I. I really don't like thinking about it, but my denial isn't helping matters.

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